top of page

By:

Rahul Kulkarni

30 March 2025 at 3:32:54 pm

The Boundary Collapse

When kindness becomes micromanagement It started with a simple leave request.   “Hey, can I take Friday off? Need a personal day,” Meera messaged Rohit. Rohit replied instantly:   “Of course. All good. Just stay reachable if anything urgent comes up.”   He meant it as reassurance. But the team didn’t hear reassurance. They heard a rule.   By noon, two things had shifted inside The Workshop:   Meera felt guilty for even asking. Everyone else quietly updated their mental handbook: Leave is...

The Boundary Collapse

When kindness becomes micromanagement It started with a simple leave request.   “Hey, can I take Friday off? Need a personal day,” Meera messaged Rohit. Rohit replied instantly:   “Of course. All good. Just stay reachable if anything urgent comes up.”   He meant it as reassurance. But the team didn’t hear reassurance. They heard a rule.   By noon, two things had shifted inside The Workshop:   Meera felt guilty for even asking. Everyone else quietly updated their mental handbook: Leave is allowed… but not really. This is boundary collapse… when a leader’s good intentions unintentionally blur the limits that protect autonomy and rest. When care quietly turns into control Founders rarely intend to micromanage.   What looks like control from the outside often starts as care from the inside. “Let me help before something breaks.” “Let me stay involved so we don’t lose time.” “Loop me in… I don’t want you stressed.” Supportive tone.   Good intentions.   But one invisible truth defines workplace psychology: When power says “optional,” it never feels optional.
So when a client requested a revision, Rohit gently pinged:   “If you’re free, could you take a look?” Of course she logged in.   Of course she handled it.   And by Monday, the cultural shift was complete: Leave = location change, not a boundary.   A founder’s instinct had quietly become a system. Pattern 1: The Generous Micromanager Modern micromanagement rarely looks aggressive. It looks thoughtful :   “Let me refine this so you’re not stuck.” “I’ll review it quickly.”   “Share drafts so we stay aligned.”   Leaders believe they’re being helpful. Teams hear:   “You don’t fully trust me.” “I should check with you before finishing anything.”   “My decisions aren’t final.” Gentle micromanagement shrinks ownership faster than harsh micromanagement ever did because people can’t challenge kindness. Pattern 2: Cultural conditioning around availability In many Indian workplaces, “time off” has an unspoken footnote: Be reachable. Just in case. No one says it directly.   No one pushes back openly.   The expectation survives through habit: Leave… but monitor messages. Rest… but don’t disconnect. Recover… but stay alert. Contrast this with a global team we worked with: A designer wrote,   “I’ll be off Friday, but available if needed.” Her manager replied:   “If you’re working on your off-day, we mismanaged the workload… not the boundary.”   One conversation.   Two cultural philosophies.   Two completely different emotional outcomes.   Pattern 3: The override reflex Every founder has a version of this reflex.   Whenever Rohit sensed risk, real or imagined, he stepped in: Rewriting copy.   Adjusting a design.   Rescoping a task.   Reframing an email. Always fast.   Always polite.   Always “just helping.” But each override delivered one message:   “Your autonomy is conditional.” You own decisions…   until the founder feels uneasy.   You take initiative…   until instinct replaces delegation.   No confrontation.   No drama.   Just quiet erosion of confidence.   The family-business amplification Boundary collapse becomes extreme in family-managed companies.   We worked with one firm where four family members… founder, spouse, father, cousin… all had informal authority. Everyone cared.   Everyone meant well.   But for employees, decision-making became a maze: Strategy approved by the founder.   Aesthetics by the spouse.   Finance by the father. Tone by the cousin.   They didn’t need leadership.   They needed clarity.   Good intentions without boundaries create internal anarchy. The global contrast A European product team offered a striking counterexample.   There, the founder rarely intervened mid-stream… not because of distance, but because of design:   “If you own the decision, you own the consequences.” Decision rights were clear.   Escalation paths were explicit.   Authority didn’t shift with mood or urgency. No late-night edits.   No surprise rewrites.   No “quick checks.”   No emotional overrides. As one designer put it:   “If my boss wants to intervene, he has to call a decision review. That friction protects my autonomy.” The result:   Faster execution, higher ownership and zero emotional whiplash. Boundaries weren’t personal.   They were structural .   That difference changes everything. Why boundary collapse is so costly Its damage is not dramatic.   It’s cumulative.   People stop resting → you get presence, not energy.   People stop taking initiative → decisions freeze.   People stop trusting empowerment → autonomy becomes theatre.   People start anticipating the boss → performance becomes emotional labour.   People burn out silently → not from work, but from vigilance.   Boundary collapse doesn’t create chaos.   It creates hyper-alertness, the heaviest tax on any team. The real paradox Leaders think they’re being supportive. Teams experience supervision.   Leaders assume boundaries are obvious. Teams see boundaries as fluid. Leaders think autonomy is granted. Teams act as though autonomy can be revoked at any moment. This is the Boundary Collapse → a misunderstanding born not from intent, but from the invisible weight of power. Micromanagement today rarely looks like anger.   More often,   it looks like kindness without limits. (Rahul Kulkarni is Co-founder at PPS Consulting. He patterns the human mechanics of scaling where workplace behavior quietly shapes business outcomes. Views personal.)

Is India Tolerant of Feminist Protests?

Updated: Nov 15, 2024

India Tolerant of Feminist Protests

Freedom of expression is a broad concept that cannot be explained simply. Expression includes what we speak, what we eat, how we react, what we wear, and much more. When I set out for work, I look into the mirror and decide what to wear; I just wear it. My loved ones express opinions, but they don’t dictate. If I don’t have something, I buy it with just a click on any shopping app. Irrespective of whether I am a working woman or a homemaker, I admit, I am blessed. I chose my educational path, I chose my career, I chose my life partner, I chose to quit work for kids, I chose to resume my profession, I chose what I eat, I decided what I wear. However, many are not blessed to have the independence to even make basic decisions in life. Being born and brought up in India, more so in Mumbai, my upbringing and broad-minded family allow me the freedom to express, decide, and protest.


As the theory of relativity rightly explains, compared to some countries, India is relatively a safe place for women who can raise their voices and still hope to lead a safe life. Especially in comparison to some Islamic countries where women do not even breathe without a man’s permission, India seems much more tolerant. In some countries like Iran, Dubai, and Pakistan, women are so suppressed that their frustration either finds a drastic path to explode into the world of freedom or they choose the most uncomfortable paths to feel relieved. In countries like Syria, women may look up to the women in Iran and Afghanistan who dare to protest. A recent example of an Iranian female student who was arrested after she stripped in protest against alleged assault by security guards over an improper hijab. Many countries witness horrible repercussions for women after they raise their voices. Some countries give them the right to express themselves freely by law, while others don’t. Many women like Malala Yusufzai have paid a huge price for objecting to the norms. Movements against the oppression of women in Iran, Pakistan, Afghanistan, and many such Islamic countries are not new to our knowledge. Some women chose to protest, after which they faced horrible consequences from the moral policing monitors, while others unknowingly fell prey to mob lynching after their attire didn’t match the ideology of the fanatics. For example, just a few months ago, in early 2024, Syeda Shehrbano Naqvi of Pakistan saved a teenage girl in Lahore from falling prey to horrible consequences after an angry mob accused her of blasphemy after mistaking the Arabic calligraphy printed on her dress for verses from the Quran.


Some women lack the courage to defy societal norms and openly seek discreet ways to fulfill their desires. Mumbai-based photographer Veena Gokhale shared how a Sheikh's daughter in Dubai secretly hired her for a bikini photoshoot, expressing her frustration with always being fully covered."


While I’m grateful for my freedom, it’s too simplistic to generalise India’s approach to women. Many areas still dictate what women must do. Not a single day the sun sets without bringing unfortunate news of a woman or a child being harassed, raped, or murdered in India. Women's safety has long been a concern across both cities and villages in India. Safety concerns keep many women from relocating to the national capital. Children face harassment in school vans. From domestic violence and dowry deaths to gang rapes and daily harassment in crowded spaces, women in India constantly struggle to lead a safe, healthy life of their choice. So, the question remains: what is the difference between India and these oppressive countries? The difference is that India's approach to the protests raised was in contrast to that of others. Take the classic example of the 2008 protest by a young lady in Gujarat. It was the same way of protest that the Iranian girl chose. 22-year-old Pooja Chouhan had taken to the streets of Rajkot in undergarments in protest against police inaction in arresting her husband and in-laws who were allegedly abusing her mentally and physically over dowry demands. Was she killed or arrested after that? The answer is no. Rajkot police arrested Chouhan’s husband and others involved and initiated a probe into her grievances within 24 hours of her protest. She chose to take an extreme step to be heard, and her voice was heard. While India has a long way to go in ensuring equal rights for women and safety for women in all corners of its landscape, India’s legal system has allowed India to be tolerant of thoughts and counter thoughts that pave the way to break age-old stereotypes.

Comments

bottom of page