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By:

Asha Tripathi

14 April 2025 at 1:35:28 pm

Stop Comparing, Start Growing

Success does not grow in comparison; it grows in focus. Over the years, women have made significant strides in every sphere of life. From managing homes to leading organisations, from nurturing families to building successful careers, women have proved that strength and resilience are deeply rooted in their nature. Financial independence has become a significant milestone for many women today, bringing with it confidence, dignity, and the freedom to shape one’s own destiny. However, along...

Stop Comparing, Start Growing

Success does not grow in comparison; it grows in focus. Over the years, women have made significant strides in every sphere of life. From managing homes to leading organisations, from nurturing families to building successful careers, women have proved that strength and resilience are deeply rooted in their nature. Financial independence has become a significant milestone for many women today, bringing with it confidence, dignity, and the freedom to shape one’s own destiny. However, along with growth has come another silent challenge — the tendency to constantly observe, compare, and sometimes even compete with the journeys of others. But a crucial question arises: Is it necessary to track the growth of others in order to grow ourselves? From my personal experience of more than two decades as an entrepreneur, I have realised something very powerful — true growth begins the moment we stop looking sideways and start looking within. A Small Beginning I had a flourishing career of teaching abroad, but when I restarted my career after moving back to India, my beginning was extremely small. My very first assignment was a simple home tuition for a single student, and the amount I earned was meagre. There was nothing glamorous about it. No recognition, no large batches, no big earnings. Just one student and one opportunity. But instead of worrying about how others were doing, how many students they had, or how much they were earning, I made a conscious decision—my only focus would be on improving myself. I focused on teaching better, preparing better, and becoming more disciplined and consistent. And slowly, without even realising it, things began to grow. One student became two, two became a small group, and gradually, over the years, the work expanded beyond what I had initially imagined. Looking back today, I can confidently say that the growth did not happen because I competed with others. It happened because I competed with myself yesterday. Comparison Creates Noise When we keep watching others' journeys too closely, we unknowingly divert our own energy. Comparison creates unnecessary noise in our minds. It brings doubts, insecurities, and sometimes even negativity. Instead of walking our own path with clarity, we start questioning our speed, our direction, and our worth. True success grows through focus, not comparison. Every woman has her own story, her own pace, and her own struggles that others may never see. The path of one person can never be identical to another's. So comparing journeys is like comparing two different rivers flowing towards the same ocean — each with its own route, its own curves, and its own rhythm. As women, we already carry many responsibilities. We balance emotions, relationships, work, and society's expectations. In such a life, the last thing we need is the burden of comparison with one another. Instead, what we truly need is support for each other. When women encourage women, something extraordinary happens. Confidence grows. Opportunities multiply. Strength becomes collective rather than individual. There is enough space in the world for every woman to create her own identity. Each of us can build our own niche without stepping on someone else's path. Choose Encouragement Envy weakens us, but encouragement empowers us. Rather than questioning how someone else is progressing, we can ask a more meaningful question: "How can I grow a little better than I was yesterday?" Lift As You Rise Today, after twenty years of experience, the most valuable lesson I have learned is simple yet profound — focus on your own work with honesty and dedication, and success will quietly follow you. We, women, are capable, resilient, and creative. We do not need to pull each other down or compete in unhealthy ways. Instead, we can lift each other up while building our own dreams. Because when one woman rises, she does not rise alone. She inspires many others to believe that they can rise, too. And perhaps that is the most beautiful form of success. (The writer is a tutor based in Thane. Views personal.)

Somerset Maugham’s Quiet Masterpiece

The novel’s relevance remains undimmed. It speaks to a world still governed by appearances, ambition and self-deception, while quietly insisting on the redemptive possibilities of forgiveness, self-knowledge and love in its truest form.


‘The Painted Veil,’ a novel written by W. Somerset Maugham - the celebrated twentieth century British novelist, playwright, critic, short story writer and British secret agent during World War One - is one of the author’s most poignant and haunting masterpieces.


This astonishingly beautiful novel intoxicates the reader little by little, as would a painting that begins with a sketch and progresses layer by layer into a riot of colour depicting a work that is so mesmerizing and enthralling that by the end of the narrative, the reader is left gasping in admiration.


Kitty Fane, a young, beautiful, shallow wife of a bacteriologist named Walter Fane comes to Hong Kong after marriage. She has wedded Walter not out of love, but to quickly get betrothed at somewhat the same time as her younger sister Doris (whose engagement was announced before hers). Otherwise, society and Kitty’s ambitious mother would have disapproved and commented on this untoward situation. Strangely enough, despite Kitty being far more attractive and effervescent than the rather plain Doris, the latter had managed a far better match than her.


Transplanted to Hong Kong, Kitty finds herself starved of affection and stimulation. Walter’s intellectual seriousness and emotional reserve leave her cold, and she soon embarks on an affair with Charles Townsend, the charismatic Assistant Colonial Secretary. Townsend’s allure lies not merely in his gallantry but in his promise of power and social elevation. Against his glittering prospects, Walter appears insignificant “a mere bacteriologist” in a rigid colonial hierarchy that values rank above virtue.


When Walter discovers the affair, Maugham resists easy moralism. Instead, he presents a devastatingly calm ultimatum: Kitty may have her divorce only if Mrs. Townsend agrees to divorce her husband and if Townsend commits, in writing, to marrying Kitty. Certain of her lover’s devotion, Kitty seeks him out - only to encounter the hollowness at the heart of his charm. Townsend refuses, citing his children, his wife’s comfort, and above all, his career. His chilling rationalisation - “One can be very much in love with a woman without wishing to spend the rest of one’s life with her” - strips romance of its illusion and exposes it as convenience.


Humiliated and disillusioned, Kitty accompanies Walter to Mei-tan-fu, a cholera-stricken town where he offers his services as a doctor and bacteriologist. What begins as an act of reluctant penance becomes the novel’s moral crucible. There, Kitty encounters a group of French nuns who have transformed an orphanage into a hospital. Drawn into their austere world of service, she volunteers to help, tending to children, cooking, sewing, and enforcing order.


This period marks Kitty’s true transformation. The nuns’ quiet devotion, their inner beauty and spiritual discipline, awaken in her a capacity for humility and empathy she scarcely knew she possessed. Through them, she begins to see Walter anew - not as a figure of ridicule, but as a man of intelligence, integrity and moral courage. In contrast, Charles Townsend’s glitter fades into something tawdry and small. Kitty’s belated affection for her husband is one of the novel’s most painful ironies: it arrives just as it is most vulnerable.


Walter’s death from cholera seals the tragedy. Kitty, stunned by grief, returns to Hong Kong, intending eventually to go back to England. An invitation from Mrs. Townsend to stay briefly with her family leads to one final, disquieting encounter with Charles, who once again reveals his moral emptiness by exploiting a moment of Kitty’s weakness. This last betrayal extinguishes any lingering illusion. Kitty leaves for England, older, chastened and irrevocably changed.


What makes The Painted Veil endure is not its plot but its moral intelligence. Maugham demonstrates how emotions, fleeting or profound, shape human lives without ever resorting to rhetorical excess. His prose is lucid, unsentimental and devastatingly precise. In this novel, he reaches the height or perhaps the depth of his perspicacity, offering a vision of human frailty that is neither cruel nor indulgent.


The novel’s relevance remains undimmed. It speaks to a world still governed by appearances, ambition and self-deception, while quietly insisting on the redemptive possibilities of forgiveness, self-knowledge and love in its truest form. Beneath its calm surface, The Painted Veil offers a timeless lesson: that suffering, honestly endured, can strip away illusion and reveal character and that such revelation, however painful, is the beginning of wisdom.

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